Darling Chia,
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Its difficult to talk to you about anger, for no one probably gets as angry as I do :) Nonetheless, its important to talk about it. Anger my love, is basically the frustration people feel when they don't have their own way, righteous or otherwise. One cannot really have their own way all the time, because life is composed of multitude of interactions with many people, most of whom are located beyond our locus of control. Since we cannot control or exactly affect them or what they think or do, we cannot consequently control how they make us feel. There is hence oftentimes a loss of emotional control that one may experience.
But are we really that helpless? Is there something that we can control?
The answer is that the one variable that can be controlled is self own reaction. It is the power of choosing one's reaction and exercising the power of choice in the millisecond between stimulus and response. Now that's powerful. Its potent because it not only allows one to choose reaction, but renders others powerless - they no longer can play with your emotions or emotionally blackmail you or play the games that people usually do. And while you exercise the power of choice, ask and find out what is leading to that anger directed at you. Rectify where change is needed and where you can change; and forgive where you can't.
And when you get angry, remember to breathe.
Breathe deep and long, keep quiet and take a long walk. No force is as powerful and destructive as anger. It destroys people and relationships, but most of all it destroys the angry people. Get angry by all means, but harness the tremendous energy of anger in something useful- create, walk exercise... find your own outlet.
There is more to the wonderful you that meets the eye. You will always be my beloved chia; even when I get angry :)
Love
Mummy
Its difficult to talk to you about anger, for no one probably gets as angry as I do :) Nonetheless, its important to talk about it. Anger my love, is basically the frustration people feel when they don't have their own way, righteous or otherwise. One cannot really have their own way all the time, because life is composed of multitude of interactions with many people, most of whom are located beyond our locus of control. Since we cannot control or exactly affect them or what they think or do, we cannot consequently control how they make us feel. There is hence oftentimes a loss of emotional control that one may experience.
But are we really that helpless? Is there something that we can control?
The answer is that the one variable that can be controlled is self own reaction. It is the power of choosing one's reaction and exercising the power of choice in the millisecond between stimulus and response. Now that's powerful. Its potent because it not only allows one to choose reaction, but renders others powerless - they no longer can play with your emotions or emotionally blackmail you or play the games that people usually do. And while you exercise the power of choice, ask and find out what is leading to that anger directed at you. Rectify where change is needed and where you can change; and forgive where you can't.
And when you get angry, remember to breathe.
Breathe deep and long, keep quiet and take a long walk. No force is as powerful and destructive as anger. It destroys people and relationships, but most of all it destroys the angry people. Get angry by all means, but harness the tremendous energy of anger in something useful- create, walk exercise... find your own outlet.
There is more to the wonderful you that meets the eye. You will always be my beloved chia; even when I get angry :)
Love
Mummy
